"Practice What You Preach for Once!"

      Don’t you always hate it when your parents say, “don’t do this” and “don’t do that?” What about when they tell you not to do something, yet then soon after, they turn around and do that SAME ACTION they told you NOT TO DO themselves?   

     Personally as a teen and daughter myself, that makes me instantly not want to listen to anything my parents tell me to do. I guarantee your parents hated it when their parents were hypocrites, so why would they turn around and do it right back to us? 

      What’s the answer you ask? Honestly, I don’t even know. But one answer I do know is that parents are hypocrites without even thinking sometimes. I love my parents dearly, but man… I hate it when they don’t give me explanations, and continually commit hypocritical acts. It’s not fair, and not the right way to parent in a teen’s mind. 


WHAT IS A HYPOCRITE REALLY SAYING ABOUT THEMSELVES? 
     Hypocrites are never positive people in my book, because to me, it’s as if they are liars. Liars lose all credibility. Credibility is something your parents expect you to have toward them, so why can’t we expect the same from them? I know that they “are the parent” and we shouldn’t question them because they are adults. 

     But as teens get older, our minds become more advanced, and we tend to realize when a situation isn’t fair. I know “life isn’t fair,” but still. Just because I’m a teenager, doesn’t mean I don’t deserve a little respect. Parents need to be credible to us, because if they aren’t, we don’t want to listen. Simple and clean cut as that. 
    
     I’m not saying parents shouldn’t do what they want. If parents want to drink, do drugs, and procrastinate, then fine. They should be perfectly fine with me coming home wasted, smelling like cigarettes, and not doing my homework. If they are okay with that, then they are not hypocrites. No problems there. But most parents aren’t okay with that, so don’t expect us to avoid those choices if they demonstrate to us that it is okay.

 HOW SHOULD PARENTS ACT TOWARD THEIR KIDS?

      Let’s be blunt on this subject. Parents should be an example to their kids, and their kids are a direct reflection of them as parents. Like if you’re a parent, aren’t you supposed to be “setting an example?” At least that’s just a guess… As a parent, you should want only the best for your kid, which most do. 

     You know that moment when parents hold their child right after it’s born, and they realize they would do anything for their child? Why don’t they remember that moment? Don’t they want their child to be the best person they can be? Being a hypocrite may work until that child is about eleven years old… But soon they will realize that they aren’t being treated fairly. 

     They will form their own opinions, and will decide who they are going to be. If parents start out being a positive influence, there will be no issues for kids becoming a well-rounded adult. It’s easy to do, but most parents just don’t want to alter their decisions just for their kids’ well-being.

HOW CAN BEING A HYPOCRITE EFFECT PARENTS?    
     Being busy, high-paced adults, most parents don’t even realize that being a hypocrite toward their children can even effect their reputation. I don’t think anyone wants to represent dishonesty, deception, and unreliability. I would think that they would like to represent honesty, integrity, and fairness. And not even just toward their kids, but toward their peers and the community. 

     I know I’m not a parent (yet), but I know when I become one, I want people to see my kid as a great kid, and that they were “raised right.” If your kid is known as the “bad kid,” you as a parent look like a bad parent. It may not be true that you are a bad parent, but that’s just how society views it. So by being fair to your kids, you are not only doing them a favor, but also yourself as well.

                                     HOW DO KIDS REALLY FEEL ABOUT HYPOCRITICAL PARENTS?
     In all honestly parents, being a hypocrite doesn’t make us want to be obedient. Quite frankly, it just pisses us off. We don’t want to deal with it just as much as you don’t like to deal with it. We don’t want to hear the “because I said so” excuse, and the “because I’m the parent” claim. STOP. It’s annoying for the first part, and if you really want to be an effective parent, follow your own rules. 

     The best way to get your kids on your side, is to not tell your kids to stick to something you aren’t even going to stick to yourself. It’s an easy way to gain credibility, trust, and a strong bond between you and your kids.

WHAT IS GOOD ABOUT BEING A HYPOCRITICAL PARENT?
     In contrary, parents are hypocrites for several positive reasons. They care very strongly for their kids. Parents know that some of the decisions they make are not ones they want their kids to make for themselves. So in order to make sure their kids don’t make the decisions that they do, they tell them that the decisions that they make as a parent aren’t necessarily ones to be proud of. 

     That way, maybe their kids will choose to not make those choices and take a different path. However, parents fail to remember that the hypocrisy is what makes the kids choose to rebel. It backfires, but us as teenagers need to remember that as mean and horrible as our parents may seem, they mean well. All they want is to see us happy, healthy, and successful. And I promise that if any parent sees that their child has achieved all of those statuses, they will be content knowing that they did their job right.

WHICH WILL YOU CHOOSE TO BE?
     Parents… We have now seen the positive and negatives. The choice to me is clear what parenting style is more effective. However, you still may feel your way of parenting is best. But remember your kids have feelings and they recognize and see more of your life than you think they do. They watch your every move, and you are their role model. 

     Your kids go to you for advice, guidance, and for support. Be that person that they can always count on to be a fair, honest, and positive influence. They will appreciate it, almost just as much as you will. With every word that exits your mouth and every action that leaves your body, remember your kids are always watching. 

     They love you, they look up to you, and seek your attention. Give them no reason to rebel you. Practice what you preach, and I promise you, you will have a great relationship with your teen; and better yet, a more obedient teen that will one day make a successful adult.